The Farm, The Factory, or the Firearm

OK Boys and girls, pull up a pillow, put your thinking caps on, make sure you brush for 30 seconds and let’s have a nice chat about immigration.

I won’t make any snide euphemisms about living underground or having you head up your butt, but it is quite difficult to believe it if you have not hear how the immigration debate has gained in volume over the last month. Last Monday, (I guess in an attempt to give the party more of a challenge in retaining majority in Congress) President Bush released his new immigration plan in a rare evening address to the American people. Though initially it seemed that Bush was up to his normal half-cocked antics, I found my self surprised at what turned out to be quite a shrewd plan. Immigration on the whole represents a double edged sword not only for this administration but for the God Fearing corporations running the Whitemanistan regime as well. Let’s recount some of the events over the past few months:

Populations of Latinos have been growing rapidly in all parts of the country. In addition to the large numbers of Mexicans crossing the Border, the real fear has been caused by the non-White Colombians, folks from El Salvador, Guatemalans and all the rest of the Brown populations that have taken residence not only in the cities, but in the rural areas taking all of the fabrication and factory positions.

Let’s be real about this for just a second. No one is afraid of immigrants coming to the States and taking all of the office jobs. For some reason the administration doesn’t believe that Pepe and Marisol will be the next CEOs of Legg Mason – but they are afraid that some other White man that they DO know will be able to wrangle the Latino vote and thus upset any of the White Man’s plans. Notice that the face of immigration is never the guy who comes in on a student visa and then decides to stay – it’s always the guy who came to pick fruit or cut your hedges.

Now though these individuals bear the brunt of the media’s blame – and indeed individuals may be blamed for brining in immigrants on a truck or for an attempt to cross the border on foot, they in no way represent the real interest that bring immigrants to the States. The real people at fault are the corporations. If I must be specific, look to the fabrication, meat packing, and unskilled worker industries. It is these concerns that entice people to come to this country and begin the cycle of exploitation and advantage that bolsters the illegal immigrant population.

“But Angry Negro,” you may ask, ” No Company makes these people leave their country and come here.”

I beg to differ. In Fast Food Nation Eric Schlosser discusses not only why it behooves the meat packing industry to use illegal immigrants, but also some of the methods used to bring them to the States. Meat packing specifically thrives off of a large population of unskilled workers that can be paid a penance for grueling tedious work. How much simpler (and how much greater the profits are) when you don’t have to worry about unions, insurance, or even sick leave or workman’s comp. Without those things workers are as interchangeable as parts in a machine – if one breaks you simply replace it and spare no more concern for the one that is lost. In addition this work being based on single task repetitiveness is also very dangerous. When accidents happen it is much more cost effective to replace an employee that cannot sue, complain or even miss work for fear of starvation, extradition, and general perdition. In fact, corporations have been known actively recruit Mexican citizens to cross the border and move to do the factory work, and in some will even bring them to the States. Even though this has been the case for
years, somehow the Minutemen feel safer berating the Mexicans abroad rather
than the Corporations at home. I guess Holly Farms has better security.

So now that we know how and why illegal immigrants are coming let’s return to the President’s program. In many ways the program is quite brilliant – you know in that evil genius Cobra Commander type way.

Brown people from the outside are poring into the country and begin making their influence known. The Minutemen (upstanding subjects Whitemanistan as they are demand that laws be followed. The President is in a situation. He needs to cater to the corporations who need illegal workers, but he can’t lose face with the loyal subjects. In addition to all this he is fighting a war but is running out of Brown people to send to their deaths. What is a Decider to do?

So the President comes up with a plan. First there is no way he’s going to let those Brown people get over. If they want to stay they have to apply for citizenship. Second if they want to apply they have to wait in line behind the ones who applied correctly. Third there will be a worker program so that those who do come and go legally can continue to work. Lastly we are going to use the National Guard to help secure the Border to keep the Brown people out.

If we break down each part of the plan the evil villain strategy comes out. It would only be Lex Luthor genius except that Lex is rarely as heavy handed as the President.

Brown people are going to have a harder time, but we need them to work our farms and factories so we’ll let them work and continue to be exploited and not be citizens (hence the Worker Plan) This way we can exploit them and send them back to Whatever the Hell Country it is they come From. Sure illegals can apply for citizenship but they have to wait in line behind those who applied legally. Basically – if you are rich and from another country you can go first. If you are a poor worker trying to make a way you wait for 11 years. Now if you don’t want to wait for the 11 years you can always fast track your application by applying for the military. Bush spoke of high tech Border technology in addition to fences, but it’ll be live in that as soon as the SDI system is up and running to go with it. More than likely illegal immigrants who join the Military in order to receive citizenship with have two choices. You can either continue to build fences and roads (as augmentation for the Border Patrol) or, even better, give your life and blood in Iraq. We were running out of domestic Brown people and poor Whiteboys anyway.

So in the end I have to give Bush more credit than I thought I would. Not only did he manage to silence the extremists on immigration (those who wanted a big fence and those who wanted global amnesty) he was also able to find a vehicle to aid the waning military in the War effort. As clever as it may be there is always the same victim – Brown people. No matter what happens or which way the debate goes Brown people must realize that nothing has changed. If you are illegal you will be exploited by the American Whitemanistan Machine. If anything I guess that is the one thing that puts you on the level with Brown and poor people in the States who have been citizens from the beginning. So from a domectic citizenified Angry Negro, Congratu Freaking lations. You may now pick your method of getting screwed: the Farm, The Factory, or the Firearm.

Mr. President I tip my hat to you – I didn’t know you had it in you.